Thursday, 30 September 2010

My entry to the Nerd-Off...


“To be or not to be?”
“Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Thou art more lovely and temperate.”
“The sun itself sees not until heaven clears.”

     Harry Potter:
“And now I’ll leave you with a few words: nitwit, blubber, oddment and tweak.”

     The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy:
“Secondly, it has the words ‘Don’t Panic’ written in large, friendly letters on the cover.”
“Very deep. You should send it in to the Readers’ Digest. They have a page for people like you.”
“Drink up…The world’s about to end.”
“You got a towel with you?”



Alex Day reading Twilight:
“I hate Lauren. Who’s Lauren?”
“Well that’s a pointless description; we don’t know what her mum looks like!”

Charlie McDonnell – Purple Man video:
“I’m the purple man, I’m the purple man. That is what they call me, ‘cause that is what I am. I’m the purple, purple man; The purple, purple man. What does the purple man do? He lives inside of you. With his big blue eyes (they should really be purple too.)”
“That’s the thing about purple men: they bleed purple blood!”

Wheezy Waiter:
“I love it when the coffee’s done.”
“Craig-iddy-Craig, Craig with a wig.”

“Double rainbow all the way across the sky... so intense... what does this mean?!... It might even be a triple rainbow!”

“Leeeeroy Jeeenkins!”



“In a land of myth and a time of magic, the destiny of a kingdom rest on the shoulders of a young boy. His name... Merlin.”

Doctor Who:

“Most planets have a north!”
“But do you know what I have got? ... Junior school, under 14s gymnastics championships: I got the bronze!”

     The End of the World:
“Platform one forbids the use of weapons, teleportation, and religion.”
“‘They’re blue.’ ‘Yeah.’ ‘OK.’”
“I give you the gift of bodily saliva.”
“I give you the gift of air in my lungs.”
“Moisturise me!”

     (The Unrequited Dead)

     Alien in London/ WWIII:
“Do you mind not farting while I’m saving the world?”
“‘They’re green.’ ‘Narrows it down!’”
“900 years old and I’ve never been slapped by someone’s mother.”


     The Long Game:
“‘He’s your boyfriend!’ ‘Not anymore!’”

     Father’s Day:
“Who says I’m not? Red bicycle when you were twelve.”
"Don't touch the baby!"
"Everyone get behind me!"
"I'm the oldest thing in this building."

     The Empty Child / The Doctor Dances:
“Give me some Spock. Just this once, would it kill ya?”
“I like bananas.”
“GO TO YOUR ROOM!... I’m so glad that worked, they would have been terrible last words.”
“I’ve got a banana and you can put up shelves at a pinch.”
“Rose, I’m trying to resonate concrete.”
“I’ve remembered! I can dance!”

     (Boom Town)

     ?/ Bad Wolf:
“You looked into the time vortex and no-one’s meant to do that.”
“You were fantastic. And you know what? So was I!”
“Now, where were we? Oh, that’s right! Barcelona!”

     The Christmas Invasion:
“Am I ginger?”
“He gets hungry in his sleep!”
“Not bad for a man in his pyjamas: Very Arthur Dent.”
“No second chances; I’m that sort of man.”

     New Earth:
“I’m a chav!”
“Two hearts, ooh, baby, I’m beating out a samba!”
“You. Are. Not. Alone.”
“I’m a walking doodle!”

     Tooth and Claw:
“‘Och eye. We’re oot and aboot.’ ‘Er, don’t do that.’”

     School Reunion:
“I’m the tin dog!”

Girl in the Fireplace:
“‘Temporal spatial hyperlink.’ ‘What’s that?’ ‘I just made it up, I didn’t want to say magic door.’”
“‘Cool: ice gun!’ ‘Fire extinguisher.’”
"'What's a horse doing on a space ship?' 'Mickey, what's 18th century France doing on a space ship, get some perspective!"
“A door, once opened, can be walked through in either direction.”
“I think I just invented the banana daiquiri a couple of centuries early.”

“Always take a banana to a party Rose. Bananas are good!”
“Oh, you’re beautiful.”
"You're not keeping the horse!"
“That’s a point, where do you get money?”

     Age of Steel/Rise of the Cybermen:
“What am I doing here?! What am I doing there?!”
“Delete, delete.”
“What’s wrong with a van? I once saved the world with a big yellow truck.”

     ?(the one with the wire):
“Are you sitting comfortably? Good, then we’ll begin.”

     (The Satan Pit/?)

     Love and Monsters:
“‘What’s the twin planet of Raxacoricofallapatorius?’ ‘Clom.’”
“Elton, fetch a spade!”

     (Fear Her)

     (?/Bad Wolf Bay)

     The Runaway Bride:
“With this ring, I thee biodamp.”

     Smith and Jones:
“Judoon platoon upon the moon”

     The Shakespeare Code:
“To be or not to be? Oh, that’s quite good!”
“Good old JK!”


     The Lazarus Experiment:
“He’s changing what it means to be human.”

     Human Nature/ The Family of Blood:
“This watch is me.”

“This is my time-y whim-y detector. It goes ding when there’s stuff. It can also boil an egg at thirty paces. Whether you want it to or not come to think of it so I’ve learnt to stay away from hens; it’s not pretty when they blow!”
“It’s a big ball of time-y, whim-y… stuff.”
“I have until the rain stops.”
“The angels have the phone box. I’ve got that on a t-shirt.”
“ ‘Look to your left.’ ‘What does that mean? ‘Look to your left.’ Me and the guys think it’s a political statement.’ ‘He means you, you idiot.”
“Don’t blink, don’t even blink. Don’t turn your back, don’t look away and don’t blink. Good luck.”
“I’ve got this thing. Well, four things. Well, four things and a lizard.”

“Chan, Chantho, tho.”
“They say the skies are made of diamonds.”

“Laser screwdriver, who’d have sonic?”
“Here. Come. The drums!”

     (Christmas special)

     (Partners in Crime)

     Planet of the Ood:
“Donna, Doctor, friend.”

     The Unicorn and the Wasp:
“‘Ginger beer, I need ginger beer!’ ‘The gentleman’s gone mad!’”
“Is Noddy real? Tell me there’s no Noddy!”

     The Sontarum Stratagem/The Poison Sky:
"Sontar-ha, Sontar-ha"
"Mr conditional clause."

     The Doctor’s Daughter:
“Hello Dad.”
“Taking a cell sample at gun point is hardly what I call natural parenting.”

“‘Is this chicken or beef?’ ‘I think it’s both.’”
“‘Knock, knock.’ ‘Who’s there?’”
“Throw him out!”

     Turn Left:
“‘What did she say?’ ‘Two words: BAD WOLF’”

“Now we’re in trouble, and it’s only just beginning.”
“Did you know you can fix the chameleon circuit if you just try hotwiring the fragment links and superseding the binary, binary, binary, binary...?”

     The Next Doctor:
“TARDIS: Tethered Aerial Release Developed in Style.”

     Planet of the Dead:
“He will knock four times.”

     (The Waters of Mars)

“I don’t want to die.”

Other Doctor Who quotes that I can’t remember what episode they’re from:
“‘Rickey.’ ‘My name’s Mickey.’ ‘No, it’s Rickey.’ ‘I think I know my own name.’ ‘You think you know your own name, how stupid are you?!’”

(I am aware that I have missed out a few episodes and totally failed to include the series with Matt Smith but I’m afraid I haven’t had time to rewatch all 13 of those episodes at all to commit any quotes to memory. Oh, except this one: “An image of an angel does, itself, become an angel.”)

DFTBA music:

Alex Day – Georgia
“Georgia, I wish I knew who you were”

“What if you were gone tomorrow, how would I know?”

“Do you want Georgia to leave? NO! NO! NO!”

Alex Day – Heart On My Sleeve
“I’d wear my heart on my sleeve.”

Alex Day – Holding On
“I’d bake a chocolate cake for you with tiers up to the roof
Because you taught me how it’s done, like you told how to fall in love.”

“I’d ride across the sky on a bicycle built for two, if you teach me how to ride, like you taught me how to feel alive.”

Alex Day – The World Is Mine (I Don’t Know Anything)
“They say time’s a healer but my watch can’t tell the time,
The left hand stuck six months ago and I can’t find the right,
I don’t know anything”

“The pen is stronger than any sharpened sword,
But every word I write to you makes me feel like a fool,
I don’t know anything.”

All Caps – Delete You
“It started with an email; you signed it with an X.
Don’t try and deny it, you knew what would come next.
You were charming and funny, and you even called me doll.
I can’t believe I bought it. You knew that I would fall.”

“It ended with an email; I can’t believe you took that road.”


All Caps – Do You Like Me?
“Do you like me, yes or no?
Do you think that I am cute?
Would you date me, you can say maybe,
I just have to know.”

“I drew in, two boxes.
Put a check mark on your answer.
Please don’t mark no.”

All Caps – I Love Brains
“I warned them of this terrible meeting but they, err, didn’t listen to me. No one listens to me.”

All Caps – I Love You
“Oh man I hate, hate, hate frigging zombies”

“You take a shot and that’s another one down but we’re out of shells and there’s still zombies around.”

All Caps – Oh Hey Kristina
“I like this nerdy girl who does nerdy things,
Who likes John Green and goes to book signing,
And while I don’t claim to be,
The awesome nerdy guy she might need”

“I’d take you to a renaissance fair,
This year there’s a dragon’s lair and
I’ll be your dashing knight,
You’ll be dressed in white and I’ll ride into the night to your rescue”

Chameleon Circuit – An Awful Lot of Running to Do
“As a full time companion he gave me a key,
A phone with a signal in every galaxy.”

Chameleon Circuit – Blink
“Sally Sparrow I wrote you a letter to make you feel better about the fact that I’m gone.
I may be stuck in the past but the future is vast;
Don’t go looking for me, girl, you have to move on.”

“Now listen very carefully to what he’s got to say:
Don’t turn your back and don’t turn away.”

“I’m sure nothing would happen, if I were to blink.”

Chameleon Circuit – Exterminate, Regenerate
“You know that it is not too late, to hop into my ship, and leave time turning.”

Chameleon Circuit – Gallifreyan History 101
“Good morning class, I’m you’re professor, I’m going to be giving you your lecture today. Now just so that we’re all clear, this is Gallifreyan History 101, so, please make sure you’re in the right class. There’s always one, isn’t there. Right, we’ve got a lot to cover, so, let’s get started.

At first we were just Gallifreyans and that was fine.
Taking up space and biding our time.
Then Rassilon, came along,
With his ever present sense of right and wrong.
He was strong, he was mighty,
He was the founder of Time Lord Society.”

Hank Green – A Song about an Anglerfish
“Yeah, the deep sea anglerfish has no reason to be happy but she has no frigging idea, what else to be.”

“The deep sea anglerfish never has to find a mate.
They are always there together when it’s time to procreate.
One night a young male will bite a female on her side and soon he will become a sperm producing parasite.”

Hank Green –You’re not Edward Cullen
“I can’t love you because you’re not Edward Cullen”

Mike Lombardo – Abbey Never
“They said ‘Always call when you get there’ and she always called but they watched her all the time, and Abbey’s always fine.”

Mike Lombardo – That Will Be the Day
“It’s not fate if you’ve worked all your life just to make it real.”

The Oceanic Six – Monster Ate the Pilot:
“Monster ate the pilot and the power healed Carla.
Numbers been repeated now for sixteen years non-stop.
There’s something about this island that I
Can’t quite explain.”

“Polar bears are native to these subtropical climates
And there’s a fugitive aboard with a history of violence.
Smokey chased me through the jungle
Now I’m counting backwards from five.
All that’s left to say is:
Guys where are we? We’re lost”

“Woa oh, waoh oh, 4, 8.. 15.. 16, 23, 42.”

“I’ve seen Jurassic Park enough to know I should be worried,
But all that comes to mind to say is:
Guys, where are we? We’re lost.”

Tom Milsom – Indigo
“Orange, yellow, green and malachite, ultramarine, light plum and eggshell white. International Klein, blue, maroon, azure, magenta, midnight blue, harlequin and heliotrope, tea, tan, turquoise, teal and tope, amaranth and ivory; cosmic latte, tangerine.”

“If I matter to you, then all I would see is indigo for you.”

Tom Milsom – Olivia Deliberated (Cat song II)

“We’ve talked about the birds and bees, so why you hiding this from me-e-e”

Tom Milsom – Porphyrophobia

“When you’re looking for that someone and then someone comes along it never enters in your head that that someone could be wrong.”

Tom Milsom – Trockstuff EP

“We’ve reached the end, but it’s not the final curtain.
In fact I’m almost certain, a new world’s opening for me.”

“The Doctor said that aliens exist all over
From Margate to Moldova
If you know just where to look.”

May the best nerd win... DFTBA


  1. Hannah some very silly mistakes !!!
    purple man song - what does a purple man do HE COMES AND LOOKS AT YOU
    its the unquiet dead not unrequited!
    holding on- tiers up to the MOON
    and OCTARINE, light plum and egg shell white.
    there ar a couple of others i let slide too :/

  2. Ah, yes, I sorta didn't check it through properly... At least that's what I'll claim :P