Monday, 10 January 2011

Hello Dear...

Whenever I get junk emails offering money (you know, the ones from a person claiming only you can claim the money or help them move the money somewhere safe or something like that) I always wonder how on earth anyone can ever take them seriously and be pulled in by them. They're so obviously fake. So fake that they're funny! Here's one I found just now when checking my junk box (just in case a stray offer from a university had got lost in there but my search was in vain.):

Hello Dear,
I know that this proposal might be a surprise to you, but do consider it as an emergency. I am Miss Ojita Edesiri from Liberia in West Africa who is seeking for refugee in Republic of Benin under the (UNHCR) due to the longing civil war in my country.
My (late) father Dr.John Edesiri, was the personal adviser to the former head of states, also a successful business man import and exporter of Cocoa during his life time. But he was killed along side with my mother during the longing civil war and all his properties were totally destroyed.
However, after their death I managed to escape with a very important document DEPOSIT CERTIFICATE (USD$5.9M) Five Million Nine Hundred Thousand United State Dollars deposited by my late father in one of the leading bank with my name as the next of kin.
Meanwhile, I am saddled with the problem of securing a trust worthy foreign personality to help me transfer the money over to his/her country and into possession pending my arrival to meet with him.
Furthermore, you can contact the bank for confirmation, I will send to you the full contact address of the bank, once I get your positive response to help me with the transfer of the funds to your bank account, and help me with the investment of the funds, and my coming over to join with you in your country.
In the light of above I will like you to keep it to yourself and don't tell it to anyone for I am afraid of loosing my life and the money. I wait your positive response.
Remain Bless
Miss Ojita.

Now, starting it with "Hello Dear" just made me laugh from the start! I'm not the biggest fan of pet names, however meaningful or endearing however there was something sweet about this start. Somehow, someone who is obviously out to make money and doesn't care who they get it from managed to make themselves sound like a sweet old lady just saying hello. In an attempt to cover up the fact that they didn't know my name and that it was probably part of a batch of similar emails, they thought the term 'dear' was a good substitute!

We also come across the problem of being able to believe that someone in Liberia who is seeking refuge in another country has escaped with that amount of money and has the ability to reach a computer with internet connection to send this email.

Then again, getting this email did remind me of the book "Yes Man!" No, not the film, the superior book which I highly recommend you read. He replied to one of these sorts of emails with a 'yes' (obviously) and it was funny how long he was able to string the people along with replies of yes and yet not actually giving them any information. I don't get why people would think this is a good way to get money at all and it's amazing, or maybe sad, to see what sort of length people will go to to get rich. As amusing as these emails can be if you don't take them seriously, the reasons why they are sent are such a shame. The reason why they succeed is also just as sad. People being naive enough or desperate enough to think they can get money by replying, to think they even need that money. Money is such a consuming thing if used in the wrong way or put on a pedal-stool. However funny the contents of such emails may be, I don't think this world will ever be free of the sort of people who send these emails.



·         Latest book read: Still reading "Friends Like These" I should really finish it.
·         Latest film/TV/ watched: Primeval - Oh My Gosh!!! (btw, that's my reaction not the episode title!)
·         Latest music listened to: Alex Day's 'No Sacrifice' currently playing.
·         Latest food/sweets/whatever eaten: A Chocolate (hmm, I think I either need to blog at different times or eat less chocolate!)
·         Programs and web pages currently open: In Google Chrome:
Alien PresidentSnails: Brothers in shellsCylinder and MiserableFort ParadoxThe application page for a Doctor Who exhibition pilot, Matt's Blog, (the usual offenders! lol), Blogger in draft: new post, Windows Live Mail,  Windows Media Player.

1 comment:

  1. i don't know why, but i get incredibly little spam. not that i'm complaining, mind you! and when i did get any, they were deplorably short on entertainment value. i don't remember ever getting one as funny as this one here.

    unrelated note: i'm going to have to sort you out with a matnav-esque page so i can stop being called a usual offender, aren't i? B]