So, because of last week's snow, I didn't have a new section of Esther to put up. However, I'm giving my testimony at the older youth club tonight so I thought I'd share what I'm going to say with you on here:
I think sharing my testimony with you is probably one of the
hardest things I’ve had to do. Not because you’re scary or anything like that
but because how I became a Christian is one of the most important things that
happened in my life. Sharing this is basically sharing the thing that means the
most to me.
However, when I was younger, I didn’t think that I would ever
view being a Christian like that. Going to church was something I did on
Sundays because my parents took me and learning things in Sunday school would
be done out of habit or for the pride of learning however many memory verses. I
didn’t really think about what being a Christian really meant and I thought
that just going to church would mean I would be OK with God. I believed that
God existed but I never thought about it much more than that.
When I was 11, I went on a Christian youth camp where, for
the first time, I found I was being challenged to think about what becoming a Christian
really meant for me. Each evening, we would have a talk and on the last evening
the talk was on a passage from the book of Luke speaking about how God has invited us all to his great
feast, he has invited us all to be part of his family, and all we need to do is
accept the invitation before it’s too late. Anyone who ignores his invitation
or tries to get in by their own way won’t be able to go but anyone who accepts
his invitation can be saved. This really got me thinking about all I had been
taught before. It made me think about how Jesus had died for our sins and how
just knowing isn’t enough. I prayed to God that he might forgive me for my sins
as I knew I had to respond but the moment seemed to pass and I hadn’t really
changed. I was expecting some sort of big experience or realisation but I just
felt the same, only this time I realised that I needed to respond.
Over the next year, I thought a
lot about how I needed to respond to God’s offer of forgiveness and I prayed to
God about this but I was never sure if he had listened or if he had accepted
me. I doubted if trusting in Jesus’ death on the cross is enough and I wondered
if I had to do anything else. I started to listen to what I was taught at
church a bit more in the hope that I would find an answer.
The next summer, I again went on
the same Christian youth camp and on the Sunday, the preacher ended the sermon
saying that if anyone was doubting whether they were a Christian, they should
remember this verse from John: “Whoever comes to me I will never drive away.”
As I realised that I didn’t have to do anything else, that Jesus’ death on the
cross was enough I also realised that if I just asked, God would save me,
forgive me and accept me. I prayed to God and an amazing sense of peace and joy
came over me as I realised that God had saved me and that I didn’t have to do
anything else and I was free from the punishment of sin.
Immediately, I started to change.
I wanted to read the Bible and go to church to learn more about God and I
wanted to spend time praying to him, thanking God for the amazing things he has
promised me in Jesus and asking him to help me live my life for him, not to
earn anything, but as a thank you to give God the glory.
Having been brought up going to
Church and seeing other people get baptised, I knew that it was the right thing
to do to get baptised to tell everyone I was a Christian. The sermons seemed to
be about baptism as did what I was reading in the Bible at home and in
particular, a verse from Acts stood out. "Repent and be baptised, every
one of you.” I had already repented and now I knew I needed to get baptised. Eventually,
I plucked up the courage to talk to my parents about this and in the June of
2006 I was baptised.
Of course, things didn’t just
stop when I became a Christian. A lot has happened in the past five years and
God has used them to teach me more about him. It’s not easy being a Christian
and don’t believe anyone who tells you it is, but if you trust God, he will be
there for you. There were times when I was forced to choose between my friends
and going to church and there have been times when I’ve made some bad decisions
but God has been with me throughout. There have been times when it’s felt like
everything is against me, that nothing makes sense and that God has abandoned
me but God was actually using those times for my good to teach or remind me
about something important about his promises. In those times, God has prompted
me to look in the Bible, talk to a Christian friend or spoken to me through a
sermon and he’s shown me that, although we may not understand how he’s working
now or why he’s letting the things happen, he has promised that “In all things
God works for the good of those who love Him.” It may not be easy being a
Christian but God has promised that he is working in our lives and I am
convinced that facing these trials as a Christian now is worth it as God has
promised each and every person who follows him that they will be with Him in
heaven for eternity.
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